There are so many ways to get rid of prostate cancer, it just is not funny. Of course, a dreaded disease such as prostate cancer is never funny in the slightest. But seriously, with so many different things that can go wrong with a person, prostate cancer is one of those ailments that seems to have set a particularly large fire under the collective hind quarters of the medical community. So much so, in fact, that they have developed an arsenal against it to a degree that has rarely been seen since World War II. Seriously, there are just too many ways to try and beat this thing. Nobody should ever have to die of a disease that has more weapons than your average action hero does. The following is a short list containing a couple of the different types of weapons in the all out war against prostate cancer.

Hormone therapy is the kind of thing that could cause its own variety of nightmares. While prostate cancer can render a man totally impotent, or at the very least unable to ejaculate, hormone therapy can do just as much damage. And this is not just physical damage, either. A man also has his masculinity to concern himself with, after all. And hormone therapy essentially turns a man into less of a man, by inhibiting his ability to produce testosterone. This can lead to a whole host of side effects, like mood swings, muscle loss, and weight gain. Would you like to become effeminate, in addition to having your sexual abilities sacked? Terrible.

Radiation therapy is an entirely different animal from that hormone therapy jazz. For one thing, you do not have to essentially be lessened in your manliness. All the doctors do is take a beam of radioactive electrons, and zap your prostate cancer cells until they look like a bowl of soup that you accidentally left in the microwave for a little too long. While they say you can’t hear the cancer cells screaming in agony as they are mercilessly fried like fallen angels in hell, that’d be cool.